Life and What Ifs

Do you believe in the dictum that we must all enjoy life, because there is plenty of time to be dead?
Well, I do.
I love to take chances, to take risks.  Yes, I trust my intelligence enough and I take comfort in my calculated analysis, then I go for it!  I am completely uncomfortable when someone comes up to me and tells me, "but, but, what if ... yada yada..".  Come on, live a little.  
I reckon good judgement does not grow overnight.  Good judgement is acquired from a lot of bad experiences.  A lot of the bad experiences are outcomes of bad judgement.  But you have to start somewhere.  However, I see and meet a lot of people are who too fearful of failures, rejection and mistakes.  Did it ever occur to you that you can live in a bubble, completely sanitized from germs and viruses, totally devoid of human interaction, all by yourself yet you still can make a mistake?  What are the odds? They carefully analyse things. evaluating whether they should cross the line.  Life passes them by whilst they are still staring at the line they haven't crossed.
Well, if you can delude yourself into believing you are in control of the universe, go right ahead.  I will still wish that you get the experience you need to learn from it; experience is the most honest teacher I have met.   We would learn more from this lifetime if we will stop denying all the mistakes we have done.
I have learned that when it comes to living and loving, I need to take chances and I choose not to regret anything that didn't kill me.  I would not want to go back in time and fix everything that I reckon needs fixing, otherwise, I will probably be only half of what I am today.  I just believe that if we become too afraid to take chances, aren't we missing out on the best things that are yet to be?  To begin with, there are no guarantees for tomorrow.  Everything is a risk.  And it is my birthright to make mistakes.  Imperfections are all part of me.  It's part of my package.  I have not been lucky enough to meet another living creature who is perfect.  I would hate myself to love with caution, that when I die I would feel so sorry that I have loved so little.
Let me tell you this, sometimes you just have to take chances.  Close your eyes and take that leap, it may be worth the fall.  And just because some wise-ass told you that you can't do something, that doesn't mean you'll have to listen.  I get my biggest kicks when people tell me I can't do it, then I do it and show them how. I know for a fact that the best decisions I have made so far in my life, that I never regretted, are decisions I made listening to my heart.  Yes, it is the spontaneity and the candour that makes the ride worthwhile.
I didn't say go rob a bank.  All I really want to say is take chances and stop dwelling on the "What Ifs".  Laugh.  Cry.  Sing.  Dance.  Don't just sit there and breathe.  LIVE!

WHAT IS LIFE?
Life is an Adventure ... Dare it
Life is a Beauty ... Praise it
Life is a Challenge ... Meet it
Life is a Duty ... Perform it
Life is a Love ... Enjoy it
Life is a Tragedy ... Face it
Life is a Struggle ... Fight it
Life is a Promise ... Fulfill it
Life is a Game ... Play it
Life is a Gift ... Accept it
Life is a Journey ... Complete it
Life is a Mystery ... Unfold it
Life is a Goal ... Achieve it
Life is an Opportunity ... Take it
Life is a Puzzle ... Solve it
Life is a Song ... Sing it
Life is a Sorrow ... Overcome it
Life is a Spirit ... Realize it 

For My Dad

I really wanted to say something more soul gripping and heart wrenching, but this song comes to mind.
I still remember the times when my Dad would lift me up from the floor and swing me around.

I got my love for the arts, music and dancing from him.  I got mostly from him, to be honest.
And whilst not a lot of people will share fond memories about their father, I have been blessed and fortunate to have enjoyed every minute my father treated me like a Princess.  For that alone, I would always live to make him proud.
I know you're somewhere out there, smiling, grinning even.  But the proud man-soldier-father that you are, I know it's criminal to believe it, but I could never go wrong in your eyes.  I love you Papa.

Things That Make You Go ... Aww ... Award

I welcomed this week in a most contemplative mood.  Perhaps my meeting up with a friend from some years back that I have not seen for aeons affected me in a rather deep way I didn't know it would.  She has MS, or better known as a brain lesion that causes Multiple Sclerosis.  Whilst she has oral medications, they always rule out any other form of treatment, after all, it is still unclear where this disease comes from or whether it can be reversed.  She is not easy to look at, even a little painful for me. I prefer to remember her robust figure, the flushed pink cheeks always with a ready smile and the crackling laughter. I can't help think why these things happen to very good and decent people.  Albeit, when you hear her talk about her disease, she sounds more grateful than most of my healthy friends about her life and where she is at the moment.  Her eyes however uneven now and half blind, still twinkles.
Just when every single colour that I see seem to fade and my melancholia was seeping into my bones, I get a soul-touching and heart-warming surprise from Marie, The Colour of our Skin. (I have seen a lot of posts at The Coffee Shop on Blogs that are must-read, Marie's Blog is one of them.)  Marie gave me this award and I just feel so loved and blessed.  Thank you so much Marie!

I don't think there are any attendant rules, but her Post indicated I say 7 Things About Me and pass this award to other Bloggers of Note (based on my own standards this time, booyah!)
I don't really have a lot to say considering that I have done those Questionnaire Type of Getting To Know Me thingy, perhaps I should give this a little tweak. 

What are the Seven (7) things That Make Me Go Aww ....:

1. A baby's breath (both the infant and the flowers)
2. A surprise love note or gesture
3. A still night full of stars they look like the crowded subway
4. A lovely bottle of Vintage Cabernet Sauvignon shared with a great friend
5. A beautiful sunrise and a romantic sunset
6. My cat purring as we nozzle together
7. Soft kisses and warm hugs

And now for my own Bloggers of Note who deserve this

STYLISH BLOGGER AWARD:

(most of these are the new ones since all of my friends on here are in the Hall of Fame)

Stella Collector of My Humble Collections

Adult Student of Adult Student Travails

Pixie of Life thoughts!

TheSingleMom of the Single Mom Chronicles

Violet of the Gratuitous Violet's Blob

Note to my Awardees:  

No obligations.  I just want you to breathe in and take this award as my appreciation for the multitude of emotions your Blog brings to my experience as a Follower and Reader. And for that please accept my token of gratitude.

Bloated Self Image = Generation ME

The “millennials” — or those born between 1982 and 2002 — have been so “spoiled by parents who overstoked their self-esteem, teachers who granted undeserved A’s and sports coaches who bestowed trophies on any player who showed up” ... they won’t be able to handle the demands of the working world, especially during a recession. ..(sic) NY times, June 2011

Are you a guilty parent who form part of creating these "gremlins"; or do you, yourself, belong to this era of bloated self-esteem individuals, who think they can take on anything in the world without experiencing any pain or failure, ONLY because they can copy and paste, self-love themselves on their iPhones and use their beautiful faces as wallpapers?

I grew up making mistakes and being told constantly it was a mistake; when I pushed my luck, being punished for that mistake.  My parents taught me the value of integrity, unwavering faith, perseverance, resilience and that not everything is going to be handed over to me in a silver plate.  They allowed me to fail and nurtured me when I got back on my feet.  
However, in this self-indulgent times, I shudder at the thought of growing up with constant praise and materialistic entitlement.  I did not even think of myself as a stunner or pretty.  I wanted to be seen as smart and witty and generally knowledgeable. I wanted to be recognized for what I can do not how I can look on digital photoshop picture that will be the flag of my social network site.   I always believed that unless there was innate goodness in your heart, you did not deserve to live in a castle and kiss your Prince Charming.
Maybe it's just me, but this generation of "millennials" lack of humility and total irreverence is rather appalling, albeit it may be too soon to gauge their incapability to handle crisis situations and dire times, it worries me that their deeply rooted narcissism may get in the way of their capacity to rise above difficulties.  
However, is it their fault or have you heard of these affluent parents of the generation Me whose graduation presents range from cosmetic surgery to body sculpting coupons in 6 digits?  Well yes, we have created a bunch of self-confident kids whose self-indulgence is rapidly rising, but what happens if Daddy and Momma misses a beat?  I have particularly noticed behaviours of the Generation ME to range from the discourteous, to the the downright disastrous and somewhere in between.the "I am Special" and "Cocky as can be".  

I always declare to this date that I am a work in progress, but these kids push me aside to tell me in my face, well I have completed the work, you slow bitch!  I remember the days when no matter how you were raised there was the Hubris principle and on top of that, you get introduced to real life when it slaps you in the face, and things get real, as in REAL.  
It saddens me now, today, that "Narcissism" is a way of life and to behave differently and hold onto traditional values make you look like a pussy or to a lesser degree, a loser.  Selfishness is the name of the game:  "It's mine." "I was here first." "It's all about me." In order to make it to the top, crush your competitors (any which way you can, no rules and boundaries) and be America's or Britain's Next Top Model or something. 

We taught this Generation ME how to dream, the limitless possibilities in the universe, not to have any self-doubt in pursuit of what they can become.  But we should have also reminded them a bit to put their self-worth to a reality check; acquire a bit of humility and sensibility; failures are attendant to savour the sweetness of success, and a certain mindfulness that perhaps the world does not revolve around them. More importantly, it takes a certain selflessness to understand the real meaning of what have become almost elusive to them, life and love.

The Philosophy of Change

I thought I should Blog about this considering I just turned in a New Blog and a new monicker for my Blog.  I believe that it is virtually impossible to discuss the phenomenon of Change without invoking the Philosophy behind it.  
The fact is, everything changes, so everything changes.

The Philosophy of change in I-Ching is that:  Change is eternal and universal both for the cosmic and the human plane; therefore it is necessary for us all, to know how to adapt to it. I-Ching is one of the more popular and timeless Chinese Books that dates back to the Fu Hsi and Yin dynasty that should be roughly 3000 B.C.(yeah, that wayyy back). Whilst it was then, predominantly used as a Book of Divination (meaning predicting future events) it has been referenced by several philosophers and psychiatrists as well. (Carl Jung for one), as the Book (Scripture) of Changes.  It's an oracle.

I have always believed that the central theme of the way of the world is "ONE YIN, ONE YANG".  The polarities, the dichotomies.  The bright (yang) and cloudy (yin); heaven and earth, sun and moon, light and dark, masculine and feminine, hard and soft.  
Change is the constant, it determines the predominance of either.  The "Yi", the character for Change, is depicted as the sun piercing through the clouds.
In my simple understanding, there is a lot of sense in the Chinese philosophies rooted in its pragmatism.  Getting a grip of the "What is" and "What Is Not", emphasizing that humans preoccupation with activities which conditions are temporary should be corrected and avoided.  It is said that, not only that you should not subdue things by force to your will, but you should know to use the circumstances in order to achieve your purpose.  
I was fully convinced that this is not going to be easy, but when I think about it, "when you go with the flow, and ride with the tide", there is least resistance, both inside myself and the whole landscape of my reality.
The Eastern philosophies (Confucianism and Taoism) subscribe to the idea that any movement should be made on the line of minimum resistance.  ( I laugh at this because I should have listened to my Dad and I have once made a Post on this). Choosing the Path of Least Resistance.
But listen up, the Taoists believe in 2 basic rules of Human conduct:

1. Whenever you want to achieve something, you should start with its opposite. "In order to take, one will surely give first."  It's called subtle wisdom.
2. Whenever you want to retain anything, you should admit in it something of its opposite. "Be bent and you will remain straight. Be vacant and you will remain full. Be worn and you will remain new."

And rightfully so, "Everything flows ... and this too, shall pass."

Welcome to my new Blog, formally, ALMOST BUT NOT QUITE, a journal of my journey, getting there and pursuing my path.

ABOUT ME WHY NOT? Again.

Stuff about me, seems like a good idea at this time to do this so why not? 

1. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE?

None that I am aware of.  
My nickname is from the nicknames of my Dad and Mom.

But I reckon the MARIA is after my paternal grandmother.

2. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED?

Yesterday.  I cry all the time.  After reading a book.  Sue me.

Geesh, I am a cry-baby.  It washes and cleans my eyes.

3. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING?

Yes I do. Why not?

4. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE LUNCH MEAT?

I like steaks.  I am a carnivore.

5. DO YOU HAVE KIDS?

Yeppers.  Two, a girl and a boy.

6. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU?

Absolutely, I can't see why not.

7. DO YOU HAVE SIBLINGS?

Yes, one.  An older brother.  

I miss him but he must NOT know about this.

8. DO YOU STILL HAVE YOUR TONSILS?

Yes.  It would be rather odd if you had them removed for strange reasons.

9. WOULD YOU BUNGEE JUMP?

Maybe, if somebody pushes me while I think about it.

10. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE CEREAL?

Marshmallow Krispies (they're still cereals right?); Fruit Loops

11. DO YOU UNTIE YOUR SHOES WHEN YOU TAKE THEM OFF?

Nope.  Too much time waster.

12. DO YOU THINK YOU ARE STRONG?

Pretty much. Working on the spiritual strength now.

13. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE ICE CREAM?

Haagen Dasz -  Pistachio Flavour and Macadamia Nut Brittle

14. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE?

Male and Female:  eyes, then the smile.  Then I look again.

Male: Face, nails, teeth, shoes, hands

Female: Face, teeth, shoes, if wearing sandals or flip flops...
I look at toe nails and heels.

15. RED OR PINK?

Red

16. WHAT IS THE LEAST FAVORITE THING ABOUT YOURSELF?

I snort when I laugh uncontrollably.  

I can also compete in a belching competition. 

(shameless, I  know okay?)

17. WHO DO YOU MISS THE MOST?

My Dad.  Ouch.  Still painful..

18. WHAT IS YOUR ZODIAC SIGN?

ARIES

19. DO YOU HAVE A FAVORITE PAIR OF SHOES?

I like shoes in general.  I love 'em all!  

For casual walk-a rounds, sandals & espadrilles rock my world.

20. FAVORITE MEAL?

The whole she-bang!  

Option 1: Red wine, Caesar's Salad, Peppered Steak with mushroom sauce;

Mashed Potatoes or Fries; Baklava 

Option 2:  Sake, California Maki, Sushi plate; Ebi Tempura;

Tea; Chocolate Pecan Pie

21. FAVORITE GENRE OF MUSIC?

I go for almost anything from Classical to R and B.

22. IF YOU WERE A CRAYON, WHAT COLOR WOULD YOU BE?

Red

23. FAVORITE SMELLS?

Vanilla and Cinnamon

24. WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE?

One of my girlfriends, she's setting up a girls' night out

25. MOUNTAIN HIDEAWAY OR BEACH HOUSE?

Oh come on, beach of course!

26. FAVORITE SPORTS TO WATCH?

Anything that involves full physical contact and can get bloody violent.

27. HAIR COLOUR?

Dark Brown

28. EYE COLOUR?

Brown with bluish rings (I don't know, I got my Dad's irises')

29. DO YOU WEAR CONTACTS?

Yes.  I am myopic.

30. FAVORITE HEIRLOOM?

A charm bracelet from my Dad.  

(Is that an heirloom?)

Fine, if not, 

a retro ruby brooch from my Mom passed on by my grandmother.

31. SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDINGS?

Both.  I am a hopeful romantic that loves to be scared shit-less!

32. LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED?

Fast Five.  Vin Diesel of course.

33. FAVORITE ARTICLE OF CLOTHING?

Jeans.  Skinny or acid washed or torn.  Depends.

34. SUMMER OR WINTER?

Summer

35. HUGS OR KISSES?

Hugs AND Kisses

36. FAVORITE DESSERT?

Oh I said my favourites on No. 20.  Baklava, Chocolate Pecan Pie

37. STRENGTH TRAINING OR CARDIO?

Both.  Tai chi, Tae Bo and swimming is my thing.  

I also do badminton.  But that's for fun..

38. COMPUTER OR TELEVISION?

Computer

39. WHAT BOOK ARE YOU READING NOW?

Eleven Minutes, Coehlo; One Day by David Nicholls

40. WHAT IS ON YOUR MOUSE PAD?

Dell logo and the mouse.

42. FAVORITE SOUND?

Music; or au naturel - Sea breeze; Waterfalls; Rain

43. ROLLING STONES OR BEATLES?

Hmmm ... Beatles.

44. WHAT IS YOUR DREAM CAR?

Jaguar Xf though I wouldn't say no to a full muscle 1965 Mustang.

45. DO YOU HAVE A SPECIAL TALENT?

Don't we all?  I can sing and dance.  

Oh I can do programme hosting... hehe or party hosting.

46. WHERE WERE YOU BORN?

In a hospital

47. WHERE ARE YOU LIVING NOW?

In our house

48. WHAT IS YOUR GREATEST FEAR?

Heights first; Rejection second

49. WHAT BRINGS YOU THE MOST JOY?

Everyday miracles

50. WHAT PIECE OF ADVICE WOULD YOU GIVE TO YOUR YOUNG SELF?

Believe in the power of your dreams and become a legend.