Is a personal journal Blog. My intimate thoughts and ideas, my unanswered questions, even share a bit of what I can do well; just a simple collection of my writings, my paintings, or just me.
Today I can confidently say that I am intestinal flu virus-free! I have been battling with this annoying illness for a week now until my anti-bodies have finally mustered enough strength and stamina to kick asses. So I decided to wobble back to start doing something a little more productive than ...uhm...err.. continually detoxifying myself, then I had an epiphany of some sort. There are a couple of things that make me sick much more than a bacteria or a lowly virus that can crawl its way into my molecular structure. Now how do I start with this sickening list? First off in my "makes me absolutely sick" list is hypocrisy. Some people just can't handle the taking so they do the giving. So if I can't stand hypocrites, does it make me one? The world has evolved in such a way that to be completely honest with your thoughts and feelings make you an ass, a bigot or a racist. This game of "pretend" in terms of acceptance and tolerance is just making me puke.
Stupidity, to include, but not exclusive to the Press and Social Media. There are people who just really push my limits in terms of patience and understanding. I don't know if this "age of technology" has truly made a lot of people totally inane or perhaps the landscape that encourages limited, if not, absence of human and tactile interaction makes the grey matter dull. Maybe it's just me, but coming out of this stupor, I have awakened to seeing the population of stupid to be growing exponentially everywhere!
But seriously now, what really make me sick to my core? I was given this Blog link to browse and whilst most of our humanity's history has reinforced my belief about the inherent evil in men, there are just some events that are severely disturbing that to hear about famous film directors jumping to death or laid off employees summarily executing their bosses pale in comparison to the evil in our forefathers that brought forth our generation to this century. I am not from Canada, and I needed to back check the veracity of the sources as it spoke about the Canadian Holocaust. The worst crime and hypocrisy imaginable is using fear of eternal damnation and religion for power and greed. These historical archives are painful reminders of what we are capable of doing and how dark our souls can be. I can't blame the heretics, after all, at the end of the day, it is all a matter of your own faith.
Truth is, where we are and where we have been, to stand grey in a field of black make one glisten with goodness. Fundamentally there is not much of a choice.
Watching an injustice is the same as committing the injustice itself. But do we still have a moral ground? Can justice stand against the powers of money and politics and personal interests? Can we achieve a sense of vindication free-loading with the freedom fighters? Or do we have so much more pressing matters at the moment to care for such huge and daunting causes? Some people struggle making it to their front door everyday, so who cares what happens to the greater good?
I will always argue about having a choice. A choice to do good, to make a stand, to call a spade a spade, to speak the truth in the face of adversary and to accept failure with a sense of dignity. So the most atrocious thing that can make me sick, is when someone says, "I do/did not have a choice." I was recently speaking to a young lady, (22 years old), married for 3 years and is pregnant on her second child; who has been physically and emotionally abused by her husband through their married life. She tells me she can't leave the husband or report the abuses because she does not have a choice. She has bled three times during her current pregnancy and has been warned repeatedly by her attending physician that further stress and distress can be fatal to both herself and her child. But still she argues, she does not have a choice. I could have chosen to shoot her myself to end the misery altogether but better judgment and fear of eternal damnation prevailed. Today I am flu virus-free but it is nothing compared to the wealth of sickening madness also known as the lesser humanity everywhere. Whatever dark virus it is that has been handed down to us by our heritage is nothing compared to the alphanumeric man-made viruses we scamper about to find an antidote. If we choose not to find a cure for our souls then we're all damned, for good.
I was 6 years old when I first felt the trauma of losing our family's best friend. His name was "Lassie", a mixed Collie. I was practically inconsolable. I remember my Dad saying if my heart will break each time I will lose a pet, then he will never have me own another one, ever, in my lifetime. He lied. I still got pets for presents between that time and to this day. But he spoke the truth about my heart breaking into a million little pieces. This morning I woke up to the news that my sweet feline baby, Catty, has passed. I couldn't stop myself from sobbing when I saw her in her "little room". Totally lifeless. Cold. It must have been sometime in the middle of the night. I just had to look and touch her again. So I sobbed even more. Sometimes the denial stage can only last for a couple of moments. She's gone. And I can't stop blaming myself since two nights back, I scolded her for misbehaving. She's been behaving rather oddly the past few days whilst the storms battered our place. A week ago, I had to hug her close because she was shaking when the thunders clapped and the lights went poof! I should have known something went terribly wrong right after. It must have been the shock. Here's a link to a couple of her pictures. there's so much more but I have not posted them (nor have I been posting at all) http://privatelegends.blogspot.com/p/pink-pussy.html
I am a professed dog lover but having Catty has completely changed my perspective about cats. She's the first feline member of my family, we have always had dogs. Losing her just cut through my core and I don't think she will ever be replaced in my heart. Not her diva self. Not her sweet ways when she wants some cuddling. Not the way she communicates and somehow I understand and she understands. Not when she's the Number 1 fan of my cooking and my pasta dishes.Not even when she's just being a brat and earning exclusive rights to her "Catty" name. Catty would have been two years old in December. I am in absolute grief and I miss her terribly. They say all dogs go to heaven, I hope even cats do. Her lovely white fur will be a totally radical match to the pearly white gate. I only wish that if there is such a thing as an after-life for pets that she is warm and safe and loved. "As anyone who has ever been around cats for any length of time well knows, cats have enormous patience with the limitations of the human kind." - Cleveland Amory To heaven's new angel, Catty, good night baby, sleep tight and purr softly.
I do have a Facebook account. I still remember the day when a couple of well-meaning kids decided to create me one. Technically, I had two friends. Suddenly, a long unseen bestie sent me an "Inbox" message. I was thrilled. She said she was tracking me down for some kind of a get-to after having lost touch since our University days, and was surprised to find that I do have an Fb account up. She jokingly added she didn't have the heart to see me with ONLY 2 friends. That's how I started my Fb journey.
Call me a noob but I always believed that a social networking site, is as designed and intended, for "social networking." How this site turned out to be people's personal diaries/journals documenting tons of epic failures, fugly photographs and stupid updates, I really don't know. However, there are certain things I do know.
What you had for breakfast, lunch and dinner posted on your wall courtesy of Instagram is of no interest to me. As a matter of fact, it only gives everyone who can read your posts, a very vivid picture of how your poop is going to churn out at the end of the day. Tofu is very fascinating. Really.
When you are in the mood to display some ignorance, do you really have to have the rest of the public, aka as your Fb friends, agonize over your stupidity? And you even have the temerity to "Like" your own update? That's short of stroking yourself in public.
Whilst I believe in self-love as the foundation of being able to give love to others, it does not include having to withstand pictures upon pictures of your fugly face and fugly children in annoying and repugnant poses. I personally think to "Dislike" it would mean judging your gene pool, but I do fervently wish someone else will finally tell you to please Stop it already! Now unless your kids are between the ages of 2 weeks old to about 36 months (particularly hugging pets), people might still all go "Aww..." But when they're 18 years old and damn, starting to look like they are pushing 40, do you really have to post their pics on your wall? They probably have their own Fb account for crying out loud! I could always choose to Un-friend or Block you, but where's the fun in that? Watching other people delude themselves gives me a helluva kick!
Relationships, as I heard, have been either built or ruined via the infamous Relationship Status on Facebook. What's with that? I reckon this appeals to the voyeur in all of us, we want to see how things can turn from damned Fail to Epic Fail!
Maybe I am just sick of seeing how old "real-life" friends have turned out to be detestable creatures and these newfound Fb friends, given the virtual nature of the relationship, turn out to be more like-able! Odd but just keeping it real.
And yes I am keeping my Facebook account. Why not? I don't want to lose such an entertaining medium. Between the news, television, books and the cinema, reading my News-feeds on Fb is such a cheap therapeutic alternative.
I even have a Twitter account just to keep myself in the loop on what's trending in terms of the latest #. If you have no idea what a hashtag is, go twit!
