Showing posts with label Gratitude Thanks Appreciation. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Gratitude Thanks Appreciation. Show all posts

Tuesday, November 29, 2011

DYING YOUNG

It took quite a lot of thinking for me to write this post, but I figured it was something worth writing about. I really don't want to be dampening the holiday spirit but anyway ...


I remember a time in my life when I thought myself to be immortal. I drove fast, hell, I raced. I practically drank everyday and if there was no reason to drink, I will invent one. I love taking risks and daring the devil and found myself in situations when I look back on it today, I still cannot imagine how I managed to get out of it unscathed. Maybe some bruising and wounds, but aren't they supposed to be battle scars?


I remember those great fun times and I remember them.


She was envious of the coming out party of a friend.  So we said we'll make hers even more fabulous. The theme would be rainbow colours because she loved them all. That night, we all left the party irresponsibly drunk, but we had a driver. She was left behind somehow, so the next best thing to do to catch up with us in the Club we would hit was to ride in a bike. Vivian was really tall, statuesque even, because I remember she towered amongst us girls, and to call her a stunner was an understatement. Something went terribly wrong that night. The bike she shared with her cousin skidded when he tried to maneuver away from a big rock on the road, and she flew out of the bike and hit a tree trunk. We were laughing hysterically over nothing in the bar when the news hit us. On the day of her burial, we let go of a 1000 rainbow coloured butterflies.  She never made it to 18 years old.


Olivia had always been goofy looking, but don't let that fool you, she was tops in the Vanity list and her physique was deceiving. We played a mean tandem in the volleyball team. I stopped and tossed, she spiked them hard. She's the only one I know who goes to a parlour before a volleyball match.  Win or lose, she was properly coiffed. She loved life and everything beautiful about it. She always said she had something wrong with her blood, but in those days, who believed who? Everything was said in the spirit of jest and good times. One Saturday, I was told that she was rushed to the hospital, yet she was fussing over her manicure. Apparently, she refused to be ushered into the Emergency Room with her manicure colours cracking. We realized then, that her congenital cerebral disease was truly fatal. She died 2 days later. It was quick, too quick. We missed her spot in the Graduation Ball in High School. She wore her prom dress in her wake. She was vain till the end.


Carol and I are speed freaks. We have a need for speed. We both raced in the Circuit. And Carol was a damn good driver. Carol's family is half-Chinese and extremely superstitious. They believed in signs, stars, numerology, astrology, name it. I guess when she was a young kid, Carol always had an illness or was accident-prone during her birthday month. Her parents always managed to tie her down when she was much younger and kept her in detention before she further harms herself every month of September. Some Chinese I have met believe August or September to be the Death Month. She wasn't supposed to drive, but that day, my big brother had the car and he promised to drop me off wherever we would hang out and collect me back when I wanted him too. We needed one more car, Carol, of course, volunteered. It was one more week before her birthday in September.  Anna, Frieda and Lourdes rode with her. She was not even driving fast, but the truck driver that hit them from behind probably was. Her car toppled twice and hit the side of the road landing on its top. Anna recalled Carol's voice asking if everyone was alright. Everyone was alright but Carol never made it to the hospital.  She died on the spot. She was going to be 21 years old.


I was doing my internship in my graduate school in Psychology when I chanced upon one of my Mom's closest girlfriend, Bernie, in a shopping mall. I have known Aunt Bernie since her kids were babies, Claire and Anton. Anton is a boy genius and I have been cruel enough several times to use him as my lab rat when I was doing my Psychology papers. Claire and I shared a lovely bond, so she took up Psychology because she wanted to be something like me. Aunt Bernie and Claire was out shopping that day, which was the usual time-killing hobby of the people that I call, have tons of money to burn. Claire had just turned 18 and she had a new sports car as a present, and now she wanted to join me in the Special Children's Clinic I was doing internship in, for a paper she had about Autism in her Abnormal Psychology Class. I told her to come over to the Clinic the week after as I will endorse her intent to the Head Clinician. That was October. I never saw her which then I thought was rather odd because Claire sounded so enthusiastic. When December came, one afternoon when I got home, I saw my mother's face fresh with tears and I asked what was wrong. She shakily told me Claire had passed just under a week ago due to some rare viral haemorrhagic fever. I was shocked to say the least. I told my Mother of the brief encounter I had with Claire and Aunt Bernie just a month ago and Claire looked so lovely and healthy. It was completely unbelievable, I said, they lived only 2 blocks away from a good hospital. Apparently, she never took her recurring fevers seriously. (I could swear she felt immortal) By the time they took her to the hospital, she was bleeding in all the holes of her body. I was stumped and completely in denial that the following weekend I drove to their place to check on Aunt Bernie, Anton and Uncle Alex. A caretaker met me at the gate with a Guard. The family had flown to an unknown destination. They left the house, the cars, everything they owned, intact. I was told they just flew with the clothes on their backs and the caretaker has not heard since. I dared a peek and I saw Claire's brand new red Corvette parked in the huge garage along with the other Beamers, Benz and Volvos. So much money and they couldn't save the life of their only daughter. I can only try to feel the agony of being in so much wealth and yet so helpless in the time of death of a loved one. Claire was 18 when she passed and I still remember her bright eyes and very charming smile.




Today, I don't think of myself immortal. I just think I'm blessed and lucky to still be around to enjoy whatever is worth enjoying in this transitory existence. I remember all these girls I have shared my life with and now they are gone; constantly reminding me that I should live my life fully as any time and in any way, it can easily be snatched from my hand. I have so grown up to consider everyday is a day of Thanksgiving. I am thankful I am still alive and whatever it is that is out there I still have to conquer, I will, whilst I still have the time and I still live. Call me foolish, but to everyone who will read this post, Happy Thanksgiving Day!

Thursday, September 15, 2011

IS IT DAMN HARD TO SHOW GRATITUDE?

Is it just me over-reacting or has it become a 21st century trend that there are more and more people that have become completely incapable of showing gratitude?  I just see so many people around, that no matter how much you do for them, how much you help them, they will still be unhappy and believe that they deserve and are entitled to more. 
I have had my fair share of these people, probably more than the average, but I reckon these beings would lose a limb if they stop to say "Thank You."
Well, colour me stubborn, but I refuse to believe that the entire humanity has bred ungrateful clones.  I am sure that somewhere out there, there is one soul who is thankful enough he or she still lives.  
These days, I can only see that we have all become too busy bitching, being envious, getting jealous, or trying our best to accomplish what others can only dream of, we have often, if not always, forgotten to be grateful for the small favours we get.  Why?  Gee, I don't know, maybe because it's "un-cool" to be mushy.  Or perhaps because we believe we worked hard to be where we are.  Yeah, sure, right.  I mean, are you the only author of your life?  Did you come from a nut that fell off a tree?  Really? I don't think so.  Sue me.
Listen, look around you.  Think hard.  You will not be where you are now if not for people that have touched your life and have helped you in small or big ways to get there. It could have been anyone, not just your parents.  Someone.  Somebody.  A person you may have long forgotten as you now bask in your wealth and success.  Get a grip. Why don't you just stop for a short moment and think about who you owe some gratitude?  It is not going to kill you.  It may even be life-changing.


And for all those unsung heroes, those people who "habitually" extend themselves to lend a helping hand, I hope you continually keep doing good and expect nothing in return, for it hurts not to be appreciated and recognized.  I hope you don't get tired because sooner than later, the law of life pays you back a thousand-fold.  


And for everyone who has helped me become Who I Am, thank you. I am still a work in progress but I am getting there.


I found this in an old file and I truly think this human being has lived a life of Selflessness, worthy of emulation and at the very least, respect.  
Mother Teresa aptly titled her poem, "DO IT ANYWAY".


"People are often unreasonable, illogical, and self centered; Forgive them anyway. If you are kind, People may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives; Be kind anyway.
If you are successful, you will win some false friends and some true enemies; Succeed anyway.
If you are honest and frank, people may cheat you; Be honest and frank anyway.
What you spend years building, someone could destroy overnight; Build anyway.
If you find serenity and happiness, they may be jealous; Be happy anyway.
The good you do today, people will often forget tomorrow; Do good anyway.
Give the world the best you have, at it may never be enough; Give your best anyway.
You see, in the final analysis it is between you and God; It was never between you and them anyway"

Monday, August 1, 2011

Repost: Choosing The Path Of Least Resistance


I am reposting (click link please^) the third Post I made in February 2011, (back in the days when my Blog was called Coffee and Smokes Chat), mainly because I am deeply moved by a comment left by a person who chose to remain Anonymous. 
His comment was Dated 1 August 2011.
This is what he said: 


Anonymous said...



My wife is dying.

July 18, we celebrated 22 years together. She is 46 and, if the doctors are right, will never be 47. Cervical cancer that moved to her lungs. I say this because I want you to know how important your post here is. I see her in your words. Our life has not been the easy path, ever. It was her path. She chose each step, regardless of the things around her. Even when she might stumble. And now she still chooses her step. Even while looking death in the eye, she raises her skirt and lifts her foot, and takes the step she and she alone has chosen.


The grace and strength is humbling to watch.

I really wished you left an address so I could respond to you directly.  But nevertheless, I am awed by the story of your unconditional love and I am dedicating this re-post to your wife; she is an as inspiration to all of us with her unquestionable fortitude and grace even in the face of the most daunting of all life's challenges.  Thank you so much for sharing your touching story.  I am humbled by this gesture.
I wish you will see this re-post.

Feed your faith and your fears will starve to death.  ~Author Unknown

Sunday, May 29, 2011

100 PLUS

"I think that when we look for love courageously, it reveals itself, and we wind up attracting even more love. If one person really wants us, everyone does. But if we're alone, we become even more alone. Life is strange.”
- A Paolo Coehlo Quote 
When I started my Blog, my only desire was to write because I love to.  Maybe I should have listened more to my heart because this is probably part of my life's journey and writing just happens to be in the path.
I am most grateful to my Followers, now that I have reached over 100 plus.  I thought in the beginning if I could get at least 20 people to read what I write, I will be dancing up and down with joy.  I actually did when I got 20 followers, then around 40, I felt so stoked.  Today I get to more than 100 and that to me is much more than worth a dance.
My heart and my soul thank you all for joining me in this Blog journey.
I hope you don't mind but I would like to call you friends.
And if by any chance our paths would cross sometime, like they always do, I hope we smile.  Cheers!
"He is a wise man who does not grieve for the things which he has not, but rejoices for those which he has."  ~Epictetus